Thread: Alpha to Alpha (attn: Tala) 2/25/10

Running. The wind in your face, the quiet of the world all around you, this was peace and for Tala Gaurav it was one of the last connections she had left to the memory of a 'normal' life. Every morning she'd break into a run, not in lupus (though she had in the months she spent as a wolf after Cold Moon's death) but in Homid.

Running shoes pounded the tightly packed earth of the old pathways through the state park, a light sheen of sweat beaded on her brow as she pressed herself harder and harder until she thought her muscles might go so tight they'd snap.

The burn in her chest felt good, the haze on the edges of her vision letting her drift of into memory helped to dull the pain of reality. Harder and harder still she drove herself, as if running hard and long enough might leave the bitter past far behind her.

But ghosts always had a way of catching up with you... or so she'd learned in these last thirteen years. Coming up to the campfire she slowed down to a jog and then a brisk walk. Stopping at the stumps near the fire, nodding respectfully to the spirits who still rested there; she picked up her water bottle and drank deeply, a bit of water spilling down her cheek and her neck, washing away some of her fatique. Closing the bottle again and stretching she made note of the other Garou's presence and nodded politely, but silent, in his direction.

Roscoe smiled at Tala as she nodded to him. He felt as if it might just be his lucky day. She was very beautiful, which made her all the more intimidating to him, and he was already nervous about the topic he was about to attempt to discuss with her. He looked away a moment, but then looked back at her after he steeled his nerves and said, "Good morning, Tala. I was hoping to speak with you today about something. Its kind of a favor for Lisa DuLac." Before he knew it he was going into a tangent, without even waiting for her to agree to speak with him or not, "There's this cotilion thing that is supposed to go on at the plantation and even though she isn't supposed to be the focus of it, she was wondering if you would help her stay out of the spotlight and keep her from being picked by some random guy to be mated with. She want to be with me and I want to be with her. We're in love and...." He snapped his mouth shut as he had just unintentionally spilled that he had been seeing a kinfolk of the Silver Fang of significant breeding quality to a total stranger.

Tala shoots the Silver Fang Progenitor wolf a glance, as if she expects the thing to jump up and rip Roscoe from end to end. When he doesn't, however, she sighs and settles down on to the stump she'd been standing in front of.

"You got no shortage of balls, I'll give you that." Tala would have smiled, if it wasn't for the fact that she kinda felt sorry for the guy. Clearly he had no idea how this sort of thing was handled and so couldn't be expected to follow any protocol; not that there was a lot detailed out for sub-par tribes asking to steal Silver Fang kinfolks.

"So you're in love?" She thought about the statement for a moment, what the phrase meant to her... and to someone very, very far away. "This would have gone much better for you if you had left that part out... she wouldn't have been the first member of my tribe to ask for more time before being mated. Women, in this or any other day in age, are rarely happy with being forced to "mate" with anyone." She half rolls her eyes, "I can't imagine why." The tone of her voice lets Roscoe and anyone listening know exactly how uncomfortable she is with the concept of anyone being forced into mating with another person.

Tala bends down to tie her shoes, as if this discussion were as casual as talking about the weather. "Tell me... how is it that a Silver Fang kinfolk, who is kept locked up tight at the Dulac Mansion, happens to meet someone of the... what tribe are you again?"

Roscoe, still in shock of letting everything slip, can only bring himself to answer the last question he had heard between the dialogue of "Oh shit"s running through his mind and says a little too quickly, "Bone Gnawer."

Tala runs a hand through her hair, trying to hide her wince as he states her worst fear. Fianna, Shadowlord... even Get of Fenris and I could have maybe worked something out but Bone Gnawer? Gaia, you really do have a fucked up sense of humor, don't you?

"Your gal, she's under a shit ton of pressure right about now." Finally she looks directly at Roscoe. "Gotta think that it's something akin to the days of our first change. You don't know what the hell is happening to you, you feel out of control, and your future sure isn't clear or in your own hands. All you can do is ride the wave, helpless, and hope that you'll survive and come out on the otherside resembling the person you use to know when you looked in the mirror." Tala shakes her head sadly.

"Being Silver Fang isn't easy... our kin have it worse though. We're expected to try and aspire to this level of greatness that's almost unrealistic for any living being, to make others respect us when out of natural instinct people try not to follow the most arrogant and haughty and that's exactly what our families raise us to be."

"There's always someone whispering in your ear, your whole childhood, how great you are... how you're going to BE somebody, how your very existance is a boon that the rest of the world should be thankful for because you descend of Kings of the Garou... leaders of all the great protectors of Gaia and thusly, a world full of people." she shurgs. "It's hard not to let that go to your head, I guess but ..."

Tala looks down and to the left, thoughtful as if remembering something, "then some of us wake up and find we aren't what we'd thought we'd be. Suddenly our choices aren't our own and the path isn't so certain. Less and less of what we thought could be... can. Some of us fight our destiny, for a while, some even go so far as to run away from it... but Gaia is everywhere and we are who we were born to be no matter how we feel about that."

With an empathic look to Roscoe she says softly, "Right now, she's got the whole world telling her who to be when all the blood in her, all the training and instinct, tells her to fight ANYONE telling her who she is to be. The past heroes in her mind and spirit, they are screaming at her that NO ONE is her master, no one is her alpha... but for her to play her very vital role... she must learn to give ground as we all do in time. Even a Sept Alpha is someone's submissive. We all must follow someone, even leaders of packs bend knee to the ancestors and spirits when it is required of us." She glances to the Silver Fang Progenitor across the way.

"No one gets her right now." she says looking back to the bone gnawer. "Maybe, in all the world, you're the only one who does... maybe you're the one person out of everyone she wants to dominate, that she can see herself submitting to and in the face of all that she must endure, she has chosen you to hold her hand." She smiles softly, sadness in her eyes. "She will, no doubt, treasure these days forever." She sounds as if she speaks from memory.

"I'm willing to bet... she really does love you, Roscoe. She's doing that in spite of having to risk everything in her world being taken from her and destroyed... her family, her name, her pride... loving someone like that takes an amazing amount of strength. Every minute. Every day. It hurts and even when it hurts you can't help but to hang on and keep doing what the person you love most needs you to do." She rolls her head, stretching out her neck a bit.

"So... I know how much she must love you Roscoe, to risk so much. My question to you is... how much do you love her?"

Roscoe listened to it all. He knew he didn't understand a lot of it. Some of it seemed as if Tala was talking more about herself at times and at others, she was talking about her tribe in general. He took care to think about his answer. He thought especially about her talking of dominance, and how his relationship with Lisa wasn't anything close to her dominating him. To him, it was just two people who had fell in love. He did love Lisa, and it was then that he realized just exactly how much he did love her.

He looked up at Tala and met her eyes. He wasn't about to tell her how he felt about Lisa and not look her in the eyes. He wanted her to have no doubt about what he was about to say to her. He then felt sitting there and looking her in the eyes wasn't enough, so he stood up without breaking eye contact with her and says, "The answer to that question is one I want you to know I mean, which is why I'm going to stand here, alpha to alpha and look you right in the eyes and answer. I love her with all my heart and spirit. There is nothing that I wouldn't do to make her happy. I would die for her. I love her enough to endure what is ahead of us with the Silver Fang tribe. I know that this love may cost me my life, but I'm willing to risk everything to be with her and do it with honor."

Tala nods, stands and meets his eyes in return. "It's good that you're willing to do what must be done Roscoe. It will not be an easy road. You will suffer indignaties that no human man, now a days, would be expected to endure but, if you really would do ANYTHING to make her happy... here's how it's gotta be."

The Silver Fang puts a hand out and touches his shoulder, "You must use your unique position with her to make her accept her place in Gaia's plan. She can no more stop being Silver Fang Kin, without losing EVERYTHING she loves for your sake, than you can stop being Bone Gnawer. I know that sounds cruel and that it seems as though this should be as simple as two people being together... but unless you would allow the woman you love to throw away her family, her heritiage, and her way of life, just to be with you, this is how it must be."

Tala moves, as necessary, to keep hold of his eyes and make certain he's listening to ALL she's saying. "BUT... that doesn't mean you have to abandon her and leave her to suffer. You could help her to accept her place, help her to choose a good mate, and to find ways to make her life happy even when she sees nothing good left in it."

"There are many ways to love a person Roscoe, and mating is only one of those ways. Some people must express and share their love in less pleasurable ways but true love rises above the difficulties placed upon it and always finds a way to continue... no matter the impasses, impossibilities or distances between them." There is a hint of emotion in Tala's eyes that tells exactly how personal this discussion is to her... that her love and her are clearly not able to be together... that she knows EXACTLY how you must be feeling.

"If you love her, don't be selfish Roscoe... don't let her throw her entire world away. Help her to find joy in it because, well, maybe you're the only one who can."

Roscoe can't help but feel the rage of his auspice begin to come to the forefront as she tells him that he should push her to give in and be the good little Silver Fang she is supposed to be. He came to Tala for help for them to be together, not for her to tell him he should push her into her Tribes antiquated and ridiculous ways. It made his blood boil to think that this is what would be best for himself and Lisa. To push her into mating with someone else, someone she could never love, just because that is the way it has always been. It wasn't right to him. He didn't want to, but he couldn't say that to Tala. So he had to ask the question that would be the elephant in the room for him. He asks almost too sternly as he fought to control his temper and remain respectful, "And if I don't? If I choose to make her my mate? What happens then?"

"You know the sad part here, Roscoe... I sincerely doubt you've even considered for one second the position your outburst has put me in... or how much I really do wish that we could all have what we want in this life but that just isn't how things work." Tala stands up, sighs heavily.

"As for what would happen if you decided to just take her as your mate, well, first I'd tell you that you sure have one hell of a way of showing a lady you care for her. Forcing her to choose between you and her family, causing her to have that hurt in her life forever... that puts you right at the level of her fucked up family... that's what I'd say."

Tala steps into his personal space, meeting his gaze unflinching. "But, you wouldn't be the first garou not of our tribe who thought they were worthy of a TAKING a Silver Fang Kinfolk so... I'll tell you what, normally I'd just kick your ass and tell you to stay the fuck away from her, but you're in luck..." She turns and looks to the Silver Fang Progenitor Wolf spirit. "... you see that incarna over there?" she looks back to Roscoe.

"All you have to do to get me and ANY other Silver Fang out of the way of doing the horrizontal mambo with one of our Kin... is get the Silver Fang Progenitor's blessing. Surely, if you really do love her and would risk your life for her hand honorably, it can't be too much to ask to have the spirits' blessing?" Tala takes a step back.

"If he says you can have one of his Kin, then I'll drive you to the mansion myself to pick her up because clearly you're a worthy Garou. Of course, if he says no... or if you don't ask... then I'll be taking charge of the kin at the Dulac Mansion, personally, and any business you have there will have to go through me from now on. And I'll PERSONALLY employ the help the BEST Silver Fang theurge I can find to make sure a spirit is following Lisa night and day until she's properly mated to someone worthy of her. Soon." Tala motions to the spirit.

"Regretful as I am, Roscoe, those are your choices."